I find myself every other day or so when I am walking to the office or class thinking to myself: “What in the WORLD am I doing here? And HOW did I get here?” Sometimes I actually have to stop and think through that question.
I distinctly remember when our family was living in Portland, OR talking to my dad about how much school he went through, at the time he was still in school working on yet another degree. It was tough for all of us, but we got through it and I think we are better because of it (that’s a cliché thing to say, but its true). Anyway, I hated school then and throughout middle school and a little into high school. I didn’t say that I disliked school, I said hated it. A hot, burning hate that cannot be quenched with a thousand rivers of anti-hate. So the thought of my dad going to school for like 20 years after college was a little beyond my 10 year old mind… and my 25 year old mind.
So here I am. Entering the 20th grade and I have at least an olympiad to go. A goal of my advisor is for me to be done before the Los Angeles Olympics in 2012! (ok, actually she said 4 years… but that’s kind of how I keep track of time… trust me there will be Olympic stories to come).
I cant believe I am here. I am a doctoral student. I am working on my Ph.D. I am working toward becoming Dr. Bland…
… oh man… I think my 10 year old self would be extremely disappointed.
I distinctly remember when our family was living in Portland, OR talking to my dad about how much school he went through, at the time he was still in school working on yet another degree. It was tough for all of us, but we got through it and I think we are better because of it (that’s a cliché thing to say, but its true). Anyway, I hated school then and throughout middle school and a little into high school. I didn’t say that I disliked school, I said hated it. A hot, burning hate that cannot be quenched with a thousand rivers of anti-hate. So the thought of my dad going to school for like 20 years after college was a little beyond my 10 year old mind… and my 25 year old mind.
So here I am. Entering the 20th grade and I have at least an olympiad to go. A goal of my advisor is for me to be done before the Los Angeles Olympics in 2012! (ok, actually she said 4 years… but that’s kind of how I keep track of time… trust me there will be Olympic stories to come).
I cant believe I am here. I am a doctoral student. I am working on my Ph.D. I am working toward becoming Dr. Bland…
… oh man… I think my 10 year old self would be extremely disappointed.
3 comments:
I wholeheartedly agree with you. I constantly think of my 10 year-old self and how, if he knew what I did for a living, would get me in the groin on a daily basis.
The one bad thing about my 10 year old self is that it is still hearing the "friends' (who I can still call by name) calling me "Nanny Goat Cockroach".
I have just started reading your blog tonight, so I am a little behind, but I totally agree about thinking about your 10 year old self... my 10 year old self would have hated my dreams I have today! I think it is amazing that you are going to be Dr. Bland.. I don't really understand why I ended up where I am (at LCU). I suppose it is because I was pushed here by my dad, but he is now giving me an option of going wherever I want this next fall. I don't like growing up sometimes... I just sorta want to be daddy's little girl forever if you know what I mean! But life hits you! Oh well right... well that is my ramblings.
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